Showing posts with label stress management. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stress management. Show all posts

Saturday, October 3, 2015

Past Lives and Regression Therapy


Have you ever watched a movie of a historical event and been overcome with sadness and grief? Have you ever walked into a historical site and experienced extreme anxiety, for no reason?  Have you ever met a stranger and felt déjà vu---we’ve met before? These emotions are not random.

Human beings do not have random emotions. These emotions are attached to unconscious memories. The most effective way to deal with unconscious emotions resulting from traumatic events in this current life, or that are attached to past life events is Past Life Therapy (PLT), which is often called often called Regression Therapy.

To my thinking, Past Life Therapy (PLT) should be called life therapy. As a “life therapy” the goal is to free the individual in all aspects of life---to be the person you want to be mind, body and spirit.

Mind, body, and spirit living is a holistic way of living. In the U. S. we are having a renaissance in our approach to spiritual living. People are recognizing that the enlivening, immortal spirit continues always and is a resource today. We are recognizing that the mind is a nearly unlimited storehouse of data. The beliefs and value judgments we attach to this data create our quality of life mind/emotions, body and spirit.

What is Past Life Regression? It is branch of hypnotherapy, which has grown over the last 50 years to be an important addition to the healing arts. It is a therapeutic technique for accessing and re-experiencing your past lives directly. 

What does the average person have to gain from past life therapy? The most essential answer is to say less stress. Do not underestimate the power of this statement—less stress. Stress leads to inflammation (heart disease, cancer, obesity, high blood pressure diabetes, etc.), emotional issues (depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress, obsession, addiction), relationship problems, work problems, negative self-judgment, and more.

The historical or religious connotations of the words “past lives” are a huge topic requiring a knowledge base I do not have---there are many good books in the library. Hans TenDam, Dutch psychologist and internationally known PLT instructor, warns us---don’t get lost in “past life tourism.” In other words, the past life is only important in what it brings to the current life for good or ill.

It is thought that child prodigies who are piano virtuosos, speak languages they have never heard, solve intricate mathematical equations, and have specific knowledge of geography and historical events are really tapping in to past life memories.

According to Hans TenDam, PLT is regression therapy in which we accept that scenes from apparent past lives may emerge. Regression therapy derives its name from its method: recovering and reliving past experiences. The goal is the release of tension and anxiety that results from repressed feelings by bringing memories into consciousness.

Dr. Morris Netherton, my mentor, tells us it is not necessary for the client to believe in past lives for the process to work. Nor does the client need to have a specific religious, or spiritual outlook. What is needed is a willingness to accept that his/her own unconscious mind holds all the answers to current problems. Netherton focuses on the here and now life concerns.

British psychiatrist Denys Kelsey became well known in the 1950’s for his work in past life regression. He compared past-life therapy as a process with his work using traditional psychiatric techniques. Kelsey stated, “In a maximum of twelve hours of regression therapy, I can accomplish what will take a psychoanalyst three years.” (Source: Graham 1976) This speaks to the efficiency, effectiveness of the past-life therapy process.

Past-life therapy is generally short-term therapy, though the sessions are longer and tend to be more intensive than typical psychotherapy. Rabia Clark’s research (1995) shows that most therapists (74%) typically combine working in past lives with other therapeutic methods. Past-life therapy is a specialized form of regression therapy where you may regress to any point in life—adulthood, child hood, infancy, birth and the time in the womb, or previous to now.

Many therapists (26%) also do past-life therapy with children starting at about eight years of age. The main motives are childhood fears and phobias. Other motives are bed-wetting, dyslexia, depression, anger and hyperactivity.

Hans TenDam tells us about one third of clients will experience a past life while about one third remain in this life. About one third relive childhood events that appear to be older traumas that may be stimulated by past life memories. Brian Weiss, MD, psychiatrist in the U. S., (1993) found that about 40% of his patients had to go to past lives to solve their concerns.

Ten Dam tells us 40 percent of clients need regression to previous lifetimes as a key to emotional and physical healing. “When past life therapy is used to bring these long-repressed memories to awareness, improvement in the current symptoms is usually swift and dramatic.”

The clients’ primary motives for past-life therapy:

1.      Fears and phobias.
2.      Relationship problems and problems of connecting with people in general.
3.      Depressions.
4.      Physical complaints without medical explanation or not responding to medical care.
5.      Sexual problems.
6.      Addictions.
7.      Obesity and eating disorders.

Dr. Roger Woolger takes a spiritual approach. In an interview with Simon Martin (Here’s Health, December, 1991), Woolger tells us “past life memories are the autobiography of your eternal soul-—personal stories that explain who you are now and why you’re here on Earth.”

According to Woolger, “Fragments of past life memories often surface in dreams or at unexpected moments, perhaps as inexplicable abilities or as feelings of familiarity with places, historical periods and characters and the like.”

Woolger has a theory that false memories of abuse may be explained by past-life memories resurfacing during trauma. Woolger, states “Child abuse leads to shock, which can put children into an altered psychological state. And in that state they may well contact fragments of memories from past lives.”

Woolger asks, “How many of us through history have lost loved ones, seen our families wiped out by war and plague, and have not grieved? It takes a lot of energy to block feelings of pain, especially when we know we “should” be happy.” Past life/regression therapy gives allows us to put to rest patterns of sadness, sorrow and regret.

Dr. Woolger is a leading theorist and practitioner of past life therapy. His book Other Lives, Other Selves, is viewed to be one of the most comprehensive introductions to the psychological depths of past life regression.

Regression therapy is not to be confused with a past life reading, which is a passive process and has little therapeutic effect. Although some individuals try past life regression out of curiosity to see who they were in the past, for most it’s a path for personal growth and healing.

The benefits of Past Life Regression come with the help of a trained past life therapist, who can help you:
  • Release fears and anxieties linked to past life traumas
  • See personal relationships in a new light
  • Release past life traumas at the root of physical problems
  • Energize talents and abilities from the past
  • Experience the transitional states of death and beyond
  • Understand and align with life purpose 
Carol Bowman tells us we “were born not as a blank slate, but as a soul rich with both the wisdom and scars from many lifetimes.” Our unconscious memories create the patterns of choice and action that we weave into quality of life.

My life has been a tapestry of rich and royal hue, 

An everlasting vision of the ever-changing view

A wondrous woven magic in bits of blue and gold
A tapestry to feel and see, impossible to hold




Sunday, May 4, 2014

Mind/Body/Spirit Well-Being: Self-acceptance


Self-acceptance is a key construct to Mind/Body/Spirit well being. How do you approach life? Each of us is created with a valid, honorable personality. Making the most of our abilities creates a path of personal success. Success is meeting your own potential.

Understanding your personal thinking style can change your life. Have you found yourself in a group where your ideas and methods were discounted, or ignored? This causes personal stress and friction in the work group.

Each of us has a preferred thinking style that organizes how we interact with information, learn, and act in problem solving work groups. Educators and psychologists use concepts of thinking style to design lessons and understand human behavior. 

The theoretical model created by Anthony Gregorc is useful for understanding our different ways of thinking and is described in his book An Adult's Guide To Style.

According to Gregorc, there are two main preferred types--Perceptual (abstract vs. concrete thought) and Ordering (sequential vs. random thought). Perceptual thinking style describes a preferred way of working with information.

Although we have a preferred “a thinking style”, we are able to understand and use other approaches. When we become overly committed to one style, the “one and only perfect way,” we develop rigid thinking patterns. Being able to choose a mind style that suits the task creates efficient, effective learners and workers.

Value judgments should not be placed on one’s preferred thinking style as representing high or low intelligence, or naiveté/sophistication. The inherent characteristics of Perceptual and Ordering abilities should be flexible to the study or task to be efficient practical.

What is your Perceptual Thinking Style? Concrete, or Abstract

A Concrete Approach is a preference for taking in information directly through the five senses: sight, smell, touch, taste, and hearing. A concrete approach is working with the obvious, the “here and now, or what is.” The concrete person is not looking for hidden meanings and does not see relationships between ideas or concepts. For example, the occupation of financial accounting typically takes a Concrete Approach.
Those with a natural strength in the concrete style will communicate in a direct, literal, no-nonsense manner.  (Examples for US TV watchers. There is a range from Forest Gump to Temperance Brennan “Bones”)

An Abstract Approach is to visualize, creating ideas, to understand, or imagine that which cannot actually be seen. When you use the abstract quality to work, you use intuition, imagination, and look beyond “what is” to the more subtle implications.

For example the occupations of novelist, or researcher, take an Abstract Approach. The person whose natural strength is the abstract style may use more subtle ways to get a point across. (If this quote has meaning to you, you are thinking abstractly. “The man who never alters his opinion is like standing water, and breeds reptiles of the mind.” ― William Blake)

Work and learning tasks often require us to shift back and forth from abstract to concrete. Although we have both concrete and abstract perceptual abilities to some extent, each person typically has a preferred style. Some of us shift between thinking styles more easily. My hypothesis is that thinking style reflects our biochemistry as well as one’s genetic code---wow, interesting research topic!

What is your Ordering Ability preference? Sequential, or Random

Ordering Ability is how you organize information. A sequential approach allows the mind to organize information in a linear, step-by-step manner, as if following a set of directions, a computer application, or a recipe.

A sequential approach is to follow the model, a logical train of thought, or a traditional approach. You may prefer to follow a plan, rather than relying on impulse. When I plan a vacation I have a step by step plan as I do not like to get lost, or waste time in a an unknown city.

Random approach, ordering ability, lets the mind organize information by chunks, and in no particular order. Random thinking often allows us to skip steps in a procedure and still produce the desired result. We may even start in the middle, or at the end, and work backwards. Random thinkers may prefer life to be more impulsive or spur of the moment rather than planned.

Thinking Style Characteristics

Concrete Sequential worker/learner
  • Likes order, logical sequence, following directions, predictability, and working with facts
  • Learns best in a structured environment, where they can rely on others to complete this task, situations are predictable situations, and ideas have practical use
  • Has stress and difficulty working in groups and with unpredictable people
The concrete thinker is stressed when discussions have no specific point, in an unorganized work environment, and when following incomplete or unclear directions.  Dealing with abstract ideas, being asked to "use your imagination," and questions with no right or wrong answers are difficult and stressful for those with a concrete thinking preference. Concrete-sequential individuals are very stressed when things are not conventionally correct, or when others are too emotional, or too academic.

Abstract Sequential worker/learner
·      Likes for his/her point to be heard, analyzing situations before making a decision or acting, or applying logic when solving or finding solutions to problems
·      Works best when they have access to experts or references, prefer stimulating environments, and are able to work alone. They are
·      Has stress when working with multiple differing views, if there is too little time to work thoroughly, by repeating the same tasks over and over, and when boxed in by lots of specific rules and regulations.

Abstract Sequential people are stressed by "sentimental" thinking, by being asked to express their emotions, or by being diplomatic when convincing others. The abstract-sequential person may have a tendency to monopolizing a conversation.

Concrete Random worker/learner
  • Likes experimenting to find answers, taking risks, using their intuition, and solving problems independently
  • Learns best when able to use trial-and-error approaches, to compete with others, when given the opportunity to work through the problems by themselves
  • Is stressed by restrictions and limitations, formal reports, routines, re-doing anything once it is done, keeping detailed records, showing how they got an answer, choosing only one answer, and having no options.
The Concrete Random individual finds it difficult to work with fuzzy headed thinking, being told to seek hard data, and working with those unwilling to consider various options.

Abstract Random worker/learner
  • Likes to listen to others, bring harmony to group situations, establishing healthy relationships with others, and focusing on the issues at hand. They
  • Learns best in a personalized environment, when given broad or general guidelines, able to maintain friendly relationships, able to participate in group activities
  • Stressed when to explain or justify feelings, competition, working with dictatorial/authoritarian personalities, a restrictive environment, emotionally cold environment, concentrating on one thing at a time, giving exact details, negative or positive criticism.
Abstract/Random individuals are stressed by being told to be realistic, working in restrictive environments, and dealing with non-caring unemotional people.

How to Use this Information to De-Stress

  1. Understand and accept your style and abilities
  2. Understand and accept your spouse, children, family, friends, coworkers
  3. Build on strengths (you can’t change your preferred abilities but you can consciously develop new abilities)
  4. Honor what you like
  5. Honor how you learn
  6. Honor what creates stress in you
  7. Know that your preferred style and abilities are most efficient, but you can train yourself to use other thinking styles for specific tasks (flexible thinking)
  8. Choose a career that is consistent with your thinking style and life will be less stressful
  9. Give yourself permission “to be” yourself
  10. Choose work environments consistent with your thinking style and ordering ability (there is a right place for every one) 



http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piaget's_theory_of_cognitive_development


http://philosophy.about.com/od/Major-Philosophers/

Monday, October 7, 2013

Mind/Body/Spirit Synergy: Mindfulness


I am in the process of developing my mindfulness skills. There are various definitions for the term.  "Mindfulness as a psychological concept is the focusing of attention and awareness, based on the concept of mindfulness in Buddhist meditation." "Mindfulness helps us to stop living by reacting to pressure, freeing us from destructive mental and emotional patterns.  It changes our habitual way of reacting unhelpfully.  We learn and practice staying calm and making sound and creative choices.  To be mindful is to be in each moment and live our lives with understanding."

I finished reading Buddha's Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom, by Rick Hanson (2009). The book editor describes Buddha's Brain ---"a clinical psychologist and a senior neurologist explain how the brain benefits from contemplative practice and show readers how to develop greater happiness, love, and wisdom by drawing from breakthroughs in modern neuroscience."

Buddhism is not my spiritual practice but I do see great benefit from the Buddhist philosophical approach for emotional and physical well-being. Since solid research has demonstrated that mindfulness meditation does change the biochemistry of the brain, I believe we should use this knowledge to improve our emotional health. There are cultural differences between Eastern thinking and Western thinking. But often these differences are exaggerated by our own insecurities.

It is disconcerting to me when meditation practices advocate letting go of your sense of self, be impersonal---etc. As a Westerner, and from the USA, we tend to see Eastern practices as creating an overly compliant, dependent populace. (Yes this a naive, biased, stereotype but it seems to be human nature to be negatively biased about the unknown, which may actually be an evolutionary survival mechanism. Buddha’s Brain, the book, addresses topics like this.) And I am sure many Easterners view our striving for assertiveness as arrogant and aggressive. To me it seems the best place to be is living in the middle and having the ability to choose behavioral responses from either end of the continuum that enhance one’s life and well-being.

Constant aggressiveness creates a body chemistry overloaded with stress hormones, which is damaging to the body. Being overly compliant also creates an over abundance of stress hormones. Both behavior choices displaying “fight or flight” stress reaction. So perhaps we are not on opposite ends of a continuum but we are actually standing side by side—brothers and sisters under the skin.

One then sees that the best place to be is to be impersonal, let go of excessive self-interest. It is not easy; it is a mental discipline. How many of us make ourselves sick worrying over things we cannot change. Possibly we could have a positive effect if we calmed our minds to allow creative insight and intuition.

If the ego self is overly invested in controlling a situation for a specific outcome, we limit our possibilities. I am in a time of transition between being retired from a career that defined my livelihood, and my emotional sense of self-worth and self-competence and I am transitioning to ……? That blank space creates an inner tension and stress. When my ego self takes over and I worry about the future, or crave the economic stability of the past, my thinking becomes stuck, frozen.

Mindfulness meditation has helped me realize that quieting the mind puts me in touch with my own inner knowing and allows room for inspiration from the higher realms of Spirit. At the same time the body responds by cutting back on cortisol the stress hormone and releases happy, calm hormones such as dopamine and oxytocin.

It is my hope you will join me in my mindfulness adventure. I intend to post my insights and thoughts for the day. My spiritual inspiration has opened my eyes---this is part of my new life and I still have much to contribute. Best Wishes!

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Find Your Joy--


For us to fit into our society and be of service to humanity, our family and our culture we willingly assume roles. These roles are son/daughter, brother/sister, father/mother, worker/mentor/leader. However, sometimes we lose our sense of self to other’s expectations and pressures. We are so busy doing what is expected that we forget to honor our own gifts and talents. This drains the joy out of life and creates stress. Stress adversely effects Mind/Body/Spirit wellbeing. 
I had a dream that reminded me to honor, respect and accept my Authentic Self. The Authentic Self represents the best, most genuine self. It is the You, you are meant to be. This self is a composite of your skills, talents, acquired wisdom, core values and beliefs; it is both internal and external created. The Authentic Self is a revealed creation.
Within the Mind/Body/Spirit concept the Authentic Self would represent the best use of the gifts the Creator has given you. Being in harmony with the Authentic self allows you to be most effective in your work and roles while experiencing the real joy of being Authentic.
These quotations on the search for the Authentic Self show us the search has long been a motivating force in man.
The authentic self is soul made visible. ~Sarah Ban Breathnach
Our life is what our thoughts make it~ Marcus Aurelius Antoninus
Who we are looking for is who is looking ~Francis of Assisi

This above all:
To thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.~ Hamlet, Shakespeare
The chief cause of human error is to be found in prejudices picked up in childhood~ Descartes
Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate ~Carl Jung

Being authentic is the ability to be true to oneself. Living an authentic life requires the ability to be true to our own wants, needs and desires and not live our lives by the opinion of others. Being authentic is the ability to make self-honoring choices and stand firmly in who we are in our core. Being true to ourselves gives us the insight and compassion to see others for who they are, not who we expect them to be. It frees us up from the judgment of ourselves and others and it gives others the freedom to be themselves as well.~ Victoria J. Reynolds


http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/here-there-and-everywhere/201111/21-quotes-authenticity

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Short Circuit Panic and Anxiety with Breathing


Somewhere in my childhood I had gotten into the habit of holding my breath when confronted with challenges. I think that pattern started subconsciously and somehow helped me with physical challenges, or possibly holding the breath is energizing for the “fight or flight" response. Then one day I noticed I was holding my breath when I was in deep concentration, or emotionally upset. That moment I said why am I holding my breath—that can’t be good for me?
I remembered the emphasis my yoga teachers put on breathing, which I had always found distracting. I wanted to master the pose, the yoga asana. I wanted to look like I knew what I was doing and breathing with the movement was distracting. (Of course I was naively missing one of the central points of yoga—the integration of breathing with movement.) I did however like one Cleansing Breath technique----You 1. Breathe in deeply raising your arms over your head, 2. Keep arms raised over-head and bend forward quickly at the waist 3. Force the air out of your lungs through your mouth creating the sound HHAAAA, 4. This raises the diaphragm up into the rib cage forcefully expelling stagnant air out of the lungs. I love doing this cleansing breath it is so energizing.
What is great about this Cleansing Breath technique is it could possibly save your life. The powerful exhalation of air is quite like the Heimlich maneuver. I had the chance to try it out. While taking a vitamin supplement pill, somehow I choked and breathed the pill into my bronchial tube. After the cough settled I could feel myself wheezing and feel the pill rattle with my breathing. My first reaction is what do I do? I could not imagine how anyone could get it out. I remembered my Cleansing Breath technique.
It took several trials then I coughed up the pill. I imagine if I had gone to an emergency physician, there is a technique for suctioning things out of lungs—but I’m not sure. I am quite sure that the breath technique was actually easier and less invasive.  
Previously, I discussed the relationship between feelings of panic and anxiety and a state of acidosis in the body. While the previous article focused on food choices and meal planning to short circuit feelings of panic or anxiety, this article focuses on breathing, oxygenation, to short circuit stress, and feelings of panic and anxiety.
Acidosis is displayed through three different processes 1. Metabolic acidosis, 2. Respiratory acidosis, and 3. Lactic acidosis. Metabolic acidosis is related to the processing of food into energy, respiratory acidosis is related to utilizing oxygen in the body, and lactic acidosis is the result of muscle functioning. Let’s look at respiratory acidosis and the role of oxygen in the body.
The process of breathing is called respiration, which is the exchange of oxygen and carbon dioxide between the atmosphere and the body cells. Proper breathing helps you stay alkaline. Blood tends to be alkaline because the vital combustions taking place in the body are mostly acid in character. This alkalinity of the blood allows chemical processes to move acid from the tissues to the discharge points such as the lungs, kidneys and bowels. It is the concentration of oxygen, O2, and carbon, CO2 gasses that affect the PH of blood, and thereby breathing-rate.
The lungs oxygenate the blood and to remove waste carbon dioxide. Oxygen passes into the blood through the alveolar and capillary walls and removes carbon dioxide out of the blood. When you breathe out of balance you may produce a physical state called respiratory alkalosis, which leads to hypocapnea and symptoms of asthma and shortness of breath. Alkalosis a physical state due to accumulation of base in, or loss of acid from, the body. Hypocapnia (or hypocarbia) is defined as low CO2. Its causes, symptoms and treatment relate to hyperventilation.

Hyperventilation is over-breathing, which causes dizziness, lightheadedness, a sense of unsteadiness, and tingling around the mouth and fingertips. Hyperventilation is common and normal after aerobic exercise. Hyperventilation can be caused by metabolic disease, and anxiety. Hyperventilation caused by anxiety can be relieved by breathing in and out of a paper bag to increase the level of carbon dioxide in the blood.
Poor breathing habits rob energy and impair mental alertness. A 20% reduction in oxygen blood levels may be caused by the aging process and abnormal breathing habits. Aging can cause the rib cage and surrounding muscles get stiff making inhalation more difficult. Less elasticity and weak muscles leave stale air in the tissues of the lungs and prevents fresh oxygen from reaching the blood stream. Rapid, shallow, breathing causes poor posture and weak or stiff muscles, which leads to poor oxygen supply, respiratory disease, sluggishness, or heart disease.

Out of balance breathing patterns can create either respiratory acidosis, or alkalosis creating these symptoms:

•                Feelings of tension
•                Hyperventilation
•                Burnout
•                Headache
•                Chronic fatigue
•                Sleeping problems
•                Concentration problems
•                Anxiety and phobia
•                Panic disorder
•                Depression
•                Heart disease

It is essential no matter what age you are that you participate in consistent physical activity every day to maintain lung heath and good breathing patterns.

When we change our breathing patterns this influences the body’s millions of biochemical reactions producing more relaxing substances such as endorphins and fewer anxiety-producing ones like adrenaline and higher blood acidity. Breathing produces over 95% of your energy and drives your nervous system. 
Breathing exercises do not replace a doctor’s care. However they can be an effective part of treatment, are an effective coping skill, and are great as part of an anti-aging lifestyle. Just as having a balanced acid/alkaline diet can improve emotional well-being, knowing and responding to your oxygen needs through breathing and exercise will give you some control over feelings of panic, anxiety and stress. Breathing exercises bring the over-arching benefit of reversing the myriad problems caused by chronic stress. Purposefully slowing your breathing pattern triggers a state of relaxation and raises the body temperature.

Unbalanced breathing tends to cause the body to over react by tightening in several areas, or you might hold your breath, or breathe shallowly to try to stay emotionally in control. This only worsens the situation by creating oxygen deprivation and more tension heightening the stress response. When high anxiety becomes an every day occurrence we tend to get used to it then a distorted breathing pattern sets in and never leaves.

"Practicing regular, mindful breathing can be calming and energizing and can even help with stress-related health problems ranging from panic attacks to digestive disorders.” Andrew Weil, M.D.

Breath exercises work quickly, can be done anywhere, and take very little practice to master. There are many websites with good explanations of breathing exercises. It would be best to do a self-review and take an inventory of your lifestyle habits before starting a breathing exercise routine.

If you are older and sedentary examine how aging affects your respiratory system. Have muscles around the rib cage gotten stiff causing inhalation to become more difficult? You may want to start with chair breathing exercises challenging yourself to breathe a little deeper each day—trying to improve the elasticity of your lungs. You may push yourself to walk a little more quickly each day. You may try walking a little more quickly up hill. Remember you cannot undo a sedentary life style in a day but it is good to set reasonable challenges and attainable goals.

Many of us have sedentary careers and when the workday is done we feel exhausted and stressed out. We need to realize a big part of that exhaustion is the result of carbon dioxide build-up in the blood from a lack of fresh oxygen, a lack of deep breathing. Deep breathing exercise or physical exercise will get the proper blood oxygen-carbon dioxide balance back quicker. Life style changes that enhance the appropriate oxygen balance in the blood include: appropriate food choices that do not burden the blood with digestive acidosis, increased physical activity to eliminate lactic acidosis of the muscle tissue, and elimination of smoking behavior which contributes to respiratory acidosis. 

Learning stress relief breathing is a healthy lifestyle choice. Breathing exercises help when you’re stressed and want to think more clearly, need to release tension in your body, feel frustrated and want to slow things down, and when in the middle of an altercation you need to feel more centered.

Here are a couple of easy breath exercises

COMPLETE BREATH EXERCISES
1. Sit up straight. Exhale. 2. Inhale and, at the same time, relax the belly muscles. Feel as though the belly is filling with air. 
3. After filling the belly, keep inhaling. Fill up the middle of your chest. Feel your chest and rib cage expand. 
4. Hold the breath in for a moment, and then begin to exhale as slowly as possible. 
5.  As the air is slowly let out, relax your chest and rib cage. Begin to pull your belly in to force out the remaining breath. 
6. Close your eyes, and concentrate on your breathing. 
7.  Relax your face and mind. 
8.  Let everything go. 
9.  Practice about 5 minutes.
•                

HUMMING BREATH EXERCISES
Follow the instructions for inhaling the COMPLETE BREATH (Steps 1-3 above). Now, as you begin to slowly exhale, make a HUM sound. Keep making that humming sound as long as possible. Pull your stomach muscles in, squeezing out a few more seconds of humming. Then relax. Practice for 2 to 3 minutes.

BASIC CONTROLLED BREATHING

Sit or stand in a relaxed position. Slowly inhale through your nose, counting to five in your head. Let the air out from your mouth, counting to eight in your head as it leaves your lungs. Repeat several times. Tip--As you breathe, let your abdomen expand outward, rather than raising your shoulders. This is a more relaxed and natural way to breathe, and helps your lungs fill themselves more fully with fresh air, releasing more “old” air.
http://www.cmhc.utexas.edu/stressrecess/Level_One/fof.html




http://www.drweil.com/drw/u/ART00521/three-breathing-exercises.html